More Face Fungus Of The Day

It's about time I exposed another band whose tours were definitely not sponsored by Gillette. To that end, I give you Starwood.

Give 'em a big hand...

This, their self-titled second album, is a tasteful mix of Crosby Stills & Nash, the Doobie Brothers and any number of West Coast-styled acts of the 1970s that you care to mention. With one-time Doors producer Bruce Botnick helping out on production, it's no surprise that the album sounds great too, even if it lacks a truly killer song. But hell, you don't care about that, what you want to know is what they look like, right?

Happy To Be Hairy

Clearly, a strict no shaving policy was enforced at the audition stage of assembling Starwood, but they had the sense to vary the styles of facial hair on offer. This has the effect of giving each band member his own personality and appeal. In much the same way as pre-teens across the nation argued over the merits of their favourite Beatle or Spice Girl, I can imagine school playgrounds were once buzzing with the question, "who's your favourite Starwood?" Despite stiff competition, my vote has to go to the moody Chewbacca look-alike adjusting his Reactolite Rapide shades in the back row. The flourish of grey in his beard lends a certain mature and worldly gravitas to an otherwise jovial band portrait. I also like the fact that his Open University Lecturer look could be perfectly recreated with the aid of an inexpensive toy, surely adding to his already considerable playground appeal.

Starwood rivals KISS for merchandise tie-ins

And so, to the Face Fungus-Ometer. Just the fact that all seven band members are making such a concerted effort to sprout face cress warrants a high score. About the only group I've seen with a more impressive variety of moustaches are my mother-in-law's coffee morning friends, and for that reason...